According to law in Australia these are the words that make a marriage. Referred to as the Vows, according to the lexicon they are more a binding statement of intent, and in that sense a commitment:
“ I call upon the persons here present to witness that I take you as my lawful wedded wife/husband”.
But what really makes the marriage in the hearts of the couple are their personal promises, bespoke and thoughtful vows for the future.
Here are ten promises based on the ten pointers I paraphrased from Samantha Joel in my last entry – she is happy to share:
- I promise to respect, admire and appreciate who you are as well as for the person you wish to become.
- I promise to support and protect your freedom because although our lives are intertwined your choices are still yours alone.
- I promise to seek a deep understanding of your wishes, your desires, your fears and your dreams.
- I promise to always strive to meet your needs, not out of obligation but because it delights me to see you happy.
- I promise to be there for you when you need me, whenever you need me.
- I promise to nurture your goals and ambitions, to support you through misfortune and celebrate your triumphs.
- I promise to keep our lives exciting, adventurous and full of passion.
- I promise to persevere when times get tough, knowing that any challenges we might face, we will conquer them together.
- I promise to treat you with compassion over fairness because we are a team, now and for always.
- I promise to show you every day that ai know how lucky I am to have you in my life.
These promises are so absolute! However, they are a wonderful base to mindfulness in a relationship – you can use them and modify them to represent the reality you can expect in your own commitment. Enjoy writing your own version!